“I got rights, man…”

Your Daily Carlin

You know what I like about George Carlin?  No, you know what I love about Carlin?  It’s that we don’t agree.  Politically, this guy’s about as close to me on the map as Savannah, GA is to San Diego.

But here’s the brilliant thing.  You can listen to me rant, and then listen to Carlin rant, and the thing that quickly becomes obvious is that two people can approach a problem from opposite ends and reach the same conclusion if they are people who engage their brain.

And you know why that is?  It’s because the left-right dichotomy is BULLSHIT.  We don’t have two parties in DC, we have one; the Spending Your Money party, and they are united in harmonious bliss in favor of their platform.  Half of them tell you that gays are downtrodden and we must save the gays!  Half of them tell you that gays are evil – like Hitler! – and are after your kiddies!  You know what that is?  That’s a fucking distraction so you don’t bother them while they spend your money and restrict your freedom.

There are two kinds of people in politics, and they are not D or R, or pro-life vs pro-choice, and they’re not even Elitist Sellout Motherfucker vs Dumbshit Prole Constituent.

It’s the party of Thinking People vs the party of Useless Idiots.

Do you got brain?

Because you sure as hell don’t have any rights.  I love hearing people talk about rights.  I want to pat them on the head, it’s so cute.  But it’s even better when someone hears something, sees something on the news, reads about something, that isn’t supposed to happen in a nation of laws (you know… where people have rights) and they cock their twee little heads to the side in puzzlement.  You can see their poor grey matter trying to reconcile the facts in front of them with their perception of reality.  And then they turn to you with an expression I can only describe as “hurt”, and say, “But… they can’t do that!”  In defiance of all the facts in front of them, as it were.

Yes, in a nation of laws there are things “they can’t do”.  The police can’t shoot a sleeping seven year old girl in the neck, blame her grandma, arrest her father and lie to the media to cover it up.  Banks can’t break into a home they don’t own to change the locks and steal your things.  Elected representatives can’t pass an unconstitutional law demanding the fact of your existence means they can require you to participate in the market of their choice.  Six cops can’t beat a man to death because they think he might have been looking in car windows.  Child Protective Services can’t take the children of a woman whose husband beat her, because she “failed to protect” the children from witnessing domestic abuse, and then give custody to the abusive husband.  Banks can’t foreclose on a house to which they don’t own the note.  The Testical Squeezing Authority can’t perform invasive strip-searches without a warrant or consent and then, when a Colorado woman reached out and grabbed the breast of the TSA thug in a true tit-for-tat, aha, have her arrested for felony sexual assault.

Clearly, this isn’t a nation of laws.

People say, “They can’t do that” and “I’ve got rights”.  No.  You don’t.  Maybe once you had rights, or more likely one of your ancestors.  That is because there was once a time when the myriad “them” in authority would see that there was a law against something, and then not do it.   We don’t live in those days anymore.  Now, if there is a law against something, they will do it anyways.  IF you have lots and lots of money, you are free to sue them.  After a couple-three years and the cost of a small house, a judge may tell them that, yes, in fact, they are not allowed to do that and to stop it immediately.  Maybe they’ll stop, or maybe they’ll just appeal.

So, tell me about these rights of yours.  From what I see, the only right you have is the right to spend $40k trying to convince a judge to uphold the law while they do what they want any damned ways.

Published in: on August 21, 2011 at 9:29 am  Comments (3)  

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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Do I have the right to reply?

  2. Hi Emily,

    “I love hearing people talk about rights. I want to pat them on the head, it’s so cute.”

    Now that’s writing! You are a delight to read!


    • Welcome to the blog, and thank you kindly!

      Fair warning. I rant a lot, and when I’m not ranting I talk about food.

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